Milestones and Moving On

One of my most favorite parts of being a nearly nester..Nearly everyone is out of the nest. Is the celebration of Milestones in the lives of my children.  There were times when I thought that they would never leave my home.  How in the world do little boys grow up and become men who run things.....like companies?? Countries???  World Wide Conglomerates??  Some days I never thought it possible that my boys would grow up and celebrate milestones.  But I was wrong....they've grown up and we have celebrated some amazing milestones this last year.

Like this......

From skateboarding and dodging security police at his favorite skating places to Law School Graduation and passing the Oregon State Bar.

From dancing and singing in the McDonald's parking lot to a National Tour with How the Grinch Stole Christmas.

From video games to finding his one true LOVE..

From jumping off roofs and mud....lots and lots of mud to a successful return after 2 years of serving the Lord as a missionary.

I truly could not have imagined as I was patching holes in drywall and fixing broken windows that in 2014, after many years of preparation and hard work, these boys of mine would accomplish so much.

I admire young mothers who are navigating the world as they raise children in these times.  My boys were lucky, we lived on a street where there were lots and lots of other boys to play with.  They played outside and ran from house to house doing what boys do best.....Making messes.  There were basketball hoops in the front yard and trampolines in the back yard.  They drank out of the hose if they got thirsty and would dig change out of the couch to chase down the ice cream truck.  It was magical.  I'm not sure we live in that world anymore.  It was only 10-15 years ago but a lot has changed since then.

Please don't ask me how I did it.  Don't tell me I did a great job or ask what my secret was.  I truly don't know.  I never raised them with an agenda in mind of what I thought they should become or aspire to.  All I knew at the time was that I wanted them to be happy and NOT living at my house when they did it.  I am a true believer in giving your kids wings to fly and a nest for them to visit.

If I can offer any advice to those moms who are in the middle of teenage angst and toddler tantrums it would be this.

Be Present. We didn't have cell phones, iPads or lap tops.  They didn't exist.  So,when we sat for mindless hours watching little league we had to watch the game, chat with the parents around us and cheer our kids on.  Even if they were in the outfield chasing butterflies. BE WHERE YOU ARE WHEN YOU'RE THERE. Show up AND be present!!  I promise you that very quickly they will be off living their dreams and you will have plenty of time to update Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest. Mostly you will be stalking your children's Facebook and Instagram because that's the best way for you to stay in touch

Eat dinner together.  I know, I know.....there's soccer and dance and music lessons and work and overtime.  I get it.  We were busy too.  Sometimes dinner was at 9 p.m.  Sometimes dinner was frozen pizza or Kraft Macaroni and Cheese. We didn't drive through fast food very much....we couldn't afford it.  But at some point we ate together.  There were days when dinner only lasted long enough to say a quick prayer over the food, shove a few bites in and hurry out the door to the next activity.  Regardless, dinnertime is important!

Play together. Turn off the electronics and Just....Play.  Make forts out of furniture, sheets and old towels. It's magical once you get passed the groans and whining because you unplugged the iPad.

Laugh. Laughter can diffuse any tense situation.  One time the two older boys were at each other's throats and tension had escalated to epic proportions.  At my wits end I yelled at their father...."You go in there and MAKE THOSE BOYS BEHAVE!!"  He stepped in their room, shut the door and said "ALRIGHT BOYS!"  I stood on the other side waiting for Zeus to rain fire on his errant children  .....Silence... I peeked my head in through the door.  Zeus the mighty father looked at me and said.."I got nothun.."  That was the funniest thing those boys had ever heard.  They were waiting for fire and brimstone and what they got was a blank look from the almighty Zeus.  The laughter could be heard down the block and it was over.  The tension was gone.  Laughter has truly saved me.

This past weekend our New Yorker flew into town for a few days.  He arrived at the airport with his youngest brother.

Let me be honest....whenever my loved ones fly I'm sooo relieved to see them come off the plane in one piece.  It was a wonderful 4 days of talking, laughing, eating and just spending time together. Today he left.  I HATE when they leave.  That whole giving them wings to fly is a crock.  But off they go to live the life they've imagined and... It happened way too fast.